Stephen Colbert Breaks Down Exactly Why Gandalf Doesn't Do Weddings

“He is the servant of the secret fire, wielder of the flame or Anor,” he continued, before ramping up the rhetoric.

“He killed the mother truckin’ Balrog, after chasing the ancient immortal demon through the tunnels of Khazad Dum until they climbed to the peak of Zirakzigil where he smote the demon’s ruin on the mountain side.”

So now we know. Check it out in the clip above.

Colbert has form in showing off his immense LOTR knowledge, as evident in this clip from early August ― when he answered audience questions on the topic to great effect:

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Stephen Colbert Breaks Down Exactly Why Gandalf Doesn't Do Weddings